Monday, 27 March 2017

4 OF MY BIGGEST MISTAKES!!

Relaxing My Hair
Relaxed hair, I should've cared! [Age 17 - 29]
I was 17, too quick to make decisions and STUPID!! A very good friend of my mother's who is a qualified and highly recommended hairdresser and stylist relaxed my hair and chopped it into a bob and I loved it! The quality of my natural hair is pretty decent and the length is too. It's just really fine.... Having had my hair treated professionally for a year, I was lazy one weekend and instead of going to the hairdresser, I decided to purchase a kit and relax my own hair. FLIPPING IMBECILE!!!! Left the mixture in for too long, the top of my head began to burn and I was left with 2 bald patches which have never fully recovered. Although I [even more stupidly] continued to have my hair relaxed on and off for some years after that traumatic incident, I've no intention of doing so again! Not only due to that experience but, the chemicals are likely to have a negative impact later on in life as I've learned through the stories of older women. Braiding using hair extensions is also a strain on natural hair and so, I'm now at the stage where I think, like most black women, I might return to the old school and will never be lazy with it!

A 'Beneficial' Friend 
Completely different from a one night stand, FWB [Friends With Benefits] enter into a non committed intimate sharing, for want of a better way of putting it, that is to be on a strictly casusal basis... The mistake I made was allowing this to happen with one of my closest and dearest male friends many, many years ago. It lasted so damn long [at least 2 years, I think] that it felt very much like an actual relationship which neither of us wanted at the time and it all got a little bit messy. Although we are no longer in contact, we're always civil if we see one another which is actually super rare. Getting involved intimately completely destroyed what had been such an amazingly beautiful friendship because, we didn't ever openly communicate to each other how the situation was making us feel! Suffice to say, I no longer have a problem speaking my mind!!

Taking A Job I Didn't Really Want 
As you may know, I frikkin LOVE to keep myself busy especially creatively and this once led me to pursue a role I knew I wasn't particularly keen on at a company I'd heard such bad things about. I sent in my application, was interviewed, offered the job and from day one was treated so badly [as were many before me]!! Little did I know this particular chapter in my life was to turn my resilience up a gear, reignite my passion for radio and have me discover hidden skills and qualities which have since helped massively with my creative endeavors. Everything really does happen for a reason.

Going Backwards
Leaving déja vu fm the first time was something I was so, so upset about as it was due to
At déja with former resident host Linda E
and current member Colin
poor health. Returning sometime later was incredibly frustrating because, I felt stuck. I just didn't feel as though I was growing, or developing and genuinely had no idea what to do, when and how. However, going back enabled me to see clearly my strengths as a presenter, the areas in which I needed to improve, what I didn't want for my show and for myself as a professional and the platform I would need to pursue next so as to progress in the way I had been craving! 
Sometimes what you consider to be your worst mistakes might just turn out to be your best lessons, or the most needed push in what is to be a much better direction! Life, ehy?

What about you? Can you relate? What mistakes have you made that later turned out to be a blessing?


Feel free to share this post and comment below :)

PREVIOUS POST: Mother's Day Gift Ideas

RADIO SHOW PODCAST below this page.... 

Sunday, 19 March 2017

MOTHER'S DAY GIFT IDEAS!!

In the UK, Mothering Sunday falls on the 26th of March 2017. If you're celebrating [be that with your mother, or in her memory] these suggestions might be right for the occasion, specially written for those with a limited budget!

TREATS

FOOD 
  • Afternoon Tea
  • Her favourtie restaurant - private area, special surprise cake etc
  • Bake and Dance - cake making to the backdrop of your mum's fave music!
  • Picnic - indoors if the weather isn't great - blanket on the floor of the largest room, nature CD in the background, pack of cards and a few other games etc

ACTIVITIES
  • Road trip
  • Create a picture album of your best times together 
  • Memory lane - visit the place, or places where you grew up 
  • Film a 'Mothers Day Q&A' video where you answer questions about each other, or a 'How Well Do You Really Know Your Daughter' tag [visual keepsake] 

CHEAP & CHEERFUL
  • Movies and Games [anytime of the day]
  • Indoor sports at your local leisure centre, or gym etc
  • Cook a fancy [ish] meal for your mother and her partner, or to enjoy with her closest friend / friends
  • Take a stroll around your local area / town / neighbourhood with a homemade coffee / tea / hot chocolate [obviously in a flask!]

It really doesn't matter what you choose to do, or how much money you actually spend. The most important thing is the giving of your time and to ensure it's quality!

Thanks for reading. Do let me know if you take any of these suggestions on board and how it goes!  
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!! x

Feel free to use the share buttons below to forward this article :)

PREVIOUS POSTLESSONS LEARNED!

RADIO SHOW PODCAST below this page.... 

Sunday, 12 March 2017

LESSONS LEARNED!

Not too long ago I felt as though I was a boxer taking on heavyweights without a coach to train and prepare me for the fights that were to leave me battered and bruised, albeit better for having stepped into the ring!

Last month I faced a few battles with someone I had become super fond of and therefore chose [wholeheartedly] to invest my time, expertise, trust and loyalty. The fallout with them [owing to, I believe, their pride and ego] led to a tizz with another individual [who had been a friend for more than 8 years] with whom I'd never even had a disagreement before!! In short, my investments, favours and support were taken for granted and standing up for myself was met with a huge amount of disrespect and shady antics. I then had quite a battle with myself because, I'm smart enough and real enough to check my part in every situation before I look at others. You know, I'm not perfect [go figure]... I have flaws, faults and negative characteristics just like everyone else in this imperfect world. However, I can admit that and then deal accordingly!! I'm honest about both my light and shade. I'm not a pretender; you'll always know where you stand with me!

Choosing to walk away is quite easy for me [not in a horrid way - I just refuse to stay anywhere that doesn't feel right]. However, I do tend to stay much longer than I know I should due to my instinctive desire to actually make things work and to also give a second, third and fourth chance [which I know I shouldn't do]. The fact is, sometimes our circumstances are not meant to improve in the way we believe they should, or would like. Their purpose is to teach us a lesson, or two and once learned we are to leave. The End.

The lessons learned / timely reminders:
1. I have never wanted to be a director
2. I have never wanted to be a scriptwriter
3. 'Friends' who get away with going behind your back once will defo do so again!!
4. NEVER invest too much too soon in anyone, or anything! 
5. Reflection is great, prayer is even better!
6. When things go wrong and you're looking for answers, start with you
7. Always be proud of yourself for being willing to try
8. Never wear more than 2 hats per project
9. Some people are really good at hiding their truth
10. A LOT OF PEOPLE PRESENT A FALSE 'IMAGE' ON SOCIAL MEDIA!!!!

At the time of publishing this post, it was confirmed that the short film Man I Use To Be will not be produced as it "doesn't meet the aim" of the co-owner whom the story is about; with it being decided that it was not worth trying to salvage :( Huge thanks to all who were in full support of this project. It's possible the co-owner will remain in contact with the cast and create something fresh at a later date. 

This is the original trailer:


Thank you for reading. I sincerely hope you understand this post and find it helpful in some way. There will never be a time in your life that you cannot learn from so, remain open to seeing who you truly are as a person and as a professional, a friend, partner, parent etc. Be brutally honest with yourself and don't hold on so tight to pride and ego that you fail to change and adapt where and when it is necessary so that you can become the best you could possibly be. Also, a grudge will always be a silly thing to carry around with you, the same goes for regret! The best thing you can ever do for yourself is: know your worth and refuse to settle for being treated in any way that puts a dent in your value. 


Feel free to use the share buttons below to forward this article :)

PREVIOUS POST: EXCITING NEWS!!

RADIO SHOW PODCAST below this page.... 

Sunday, 5 March 2017

EXCITING NEWS!!

I'm extremely proud to have partnered with some wonderful, innovative brands whom I'll be showcasing via my platforms. The aim is to help raise the profiles of emerging talents through radio interviews, blog features and the alike. Why? Well, because, I can and it’s what [I believe] we should all be doing if we have the means. I didn't want to collaborate with a view to earning. This is simply about supporting those who are positively driven; who are making a significant difference to the lives of others. 

NOTHING CLOTHING COMPANY
I absolutely adore what this business represents. Founded in 2014 by a man with an empowering story, Nothing Clothing Company is focused on "coming together to change lives" and they do this by working with those who are like-minded to raise awareness of amazing charities and causes in line with their own ethos, as well as individuals such as myself with a platform that has a similar aim.

Marketed as a 'premier good-cause fashion company', their generous donations to those in need make them a stand out brand in an industry driven by financial gain as opposed to the desire to give. With a simple but unique logo that everyone from your grandparents to mainstream personalities around the world are wearing, or want to wear, this truly is a remarkable brand that makes everyone feel amazing! It's an absolute joy to be part of what is such a brilliant, worthwhile, authentic and giving company. 

My line will be a casual range, very me, consisting of the sample hoodie pictured, jogging bottoms, t-shirts and vests. I'm too frikkin' excited!! Oh. My. Life!! God is so, so great!

Gary Scales, the director, was a guest on my radio show [Wednesday 1st March 2017]. Have a listen to his interview for more information about how the company was founded and is funded etc by clicking the logo!



Connect with NOTHING CLOTHING COMPANY on twitter and instagram and if you would like to collaborate with me in some way, perhaps to host your event, or join forces on promoting a fabulous brand / cause etc, please email: realtalkuk_creative@outlook.com 

In other equally EXCITING news:
I've been nominated for a Divas of Colour award 2017 in the presenter category! [Don't watch the incorrect spelling of my surname in that screen shot image of the email I received, ha-ha]. I mean, WOW!!!! This is SUPER fab because, this nomination in itself is a win! It's all about the recognition!! I wholeheartedly appreciate my skills, work ethic and achievements etc being recognised and appreciated! Click on the email to see my nominee photo!! :D

Thanks for reading and for your support. 

PREVIOUS POST: NOT IN MY CLOSET!

Scroll to the end of this page to listen to my radio show!!