Sunday, 23 April 2017

MAYBE I SHOULD QUIT....

The title of this post could be one that's been on your mind recently and while I'm likely to understand why, I'm no quitter and I don't want you to be.

I've always enjoyed writing. It was poetry as a child, the odd newspaper article as a teen, blogging and publications as an adult. The passion is still there but, as the years have rolled by the engagement has become practically zilch.

The most fun aspect of blogging, for me, is actually the most challenging - deciding what to write about, writing it down, then ensuring it makes sense, spending time on any relevant research, taking/sourcing images and editing them where necessary, placing the content onto the blog and reviewing the article many times, as well as using online assistance to check the grammar/spelling and then, of course, sharing each post across my social media platforms so it reaches you!
Although readership is still amazing (7k per month on average), I'm not entirely sure if you're with me in the way you once were because, although I know you enjoy my blog and find the content useful (you wouldn't return otherwise, nor invest in the products I mention/review), there continues to be a lack of communication and interaction - so, what should I do? Stop blogging and start vlogging? Erm, the struggle would be so beyond real for someone like me who, despite being able to talk to anyone for any length of time, is not one for talking to a camera outside of presenting plus, would people actually be more inclined to interact via video? I'm super passionate about writing and that drives me so, I'm defo going to continue blogging! It's all too easy to feel discouraged, unsupported, let down, put off by closed doors and quit, but, there will always be those who do take the time to encourage, support, uplift and welcome me into open doors which also motivates me. I'm incredibly grateful for such people!! That said, first and foremost, my enthusiasm for blogging is what has me going almost 8 years strong 😊

I refuse to give up and I hope the 4 tips below will inspire you to do the same and fuel your commitment to pursue your dreams and achieve your goals, with or without the level of backing you'd like.

LEARN AND STRIVE SIMULTANEOUSLY
Expand your knowledge through research and development opportunities and start building new connections by upping your social activities. Attend events that are out of your comfort zone and will have you socialising with people you'd never usually meet!

BE FEARLESS AND SHAMELESS
You have nothing to lose and potentially so much to gain. You will always be responsible for yourself, so grab hold of that responsibility and run with it! Your only fear should be that of not achieving which should automatically motivate you. Give the pursuit of your goals all you've got with whatever you have - be proud of and inspired by that! #YouGotThis 😉

TALK TO PEOPLE ANYWHERE, ANYTIME (with caution)
Online, in person, via email, on the phone, by post! Start by introducing yourself, then say a little about what you do and why you've chosen to reach out to them in particular. Keep the message short, authentic and light (sometimes coming across too keen, or too intense can backfire so, just relax and enjoy communicating with someone new).

PRACTISE DAILY GRATITUDE
Somebody somewhere would probably trade places with you in less than a heartbeat. You need to pay attention to your blessings, you need to see how much you actually have, you need to understand just how fab your life really is because, guess what? You and I both know it could be a lot worse. It can only get better and you know this!! 

BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!
Thank you for reading. 
Whatever your circumstances might be, I pray this blog post will motivate you to go out into the world and make your mark!

PREVIOUS POST: FREELANCER TIPS

Scroll to the end of this page for the link to my radio show 

Sunday, 16 April 2017

FREELANCER TIPS

The bottom line is, you need the most amount of willpower, to be super resilient, immensely dedicated, ridiculously consistent, insanely patient and you must be hugely passionate about what you're doing. 

There are those who assume that blogging [for example] is easy, lots of fun, glamorous and "not a 'real' job". In reality, it's flipping hard [loads of planning, research, preparation, drafts, edits, photography and the rest], it can be incredibly frustrating [mostly the lack of support], there's very little to no glam however, it is definitely something many have made a fab career of.
Based entirely on my own experiences [blogging, teaching, radio, events planning], these are the ingredients I believe will / can make for an awesome freelance career [albeit, one size does not fit all]:
  • Identify what fuels your passion - what do you want to give, or share / gain and why?
  • Understand exactly what it will take to commit - not just time, personal sacrifices too!
  • Assess your skills and capabilities - do you need to study, learn the trade?
  • Ensure you are aware of and have the resources you need - from Internet access to funds - you've got to be willing and able to invest in yourself for what might be a really long time!!
  • Be realistic about what is required versus what you can actually do - e.g. monthly blogging is pointless, real talk!
  • Make sure you have a strong enough database - no contacts, no audience
  • Start with what you have and, if currently working, stay in your job! - you'll need the money and your colleagues may potentially be your market / buyers / clients etc.
  • Prepare for and accept that you will have to prove yourself - unpaid work for the experience, building your database and references is once again the way to go
  • Clean up your online presence - you want to be taken seriously and have your services hired
  • WORK on your brand - you, your products, your services, your website / Facebook page / Instagram etc.
  • Have a plan of action - what, when, how and why are you going to do whatever it is you are wanting to do? How much will you charge, how will you secure clients and maintain the relationships thereafter?
  • Where possible, attend relevant talks, seminars, or workshops about going freelance and also anything beneficial relating to your chosen field. [Beware those who may try to sell you follow-up 'courses' - do not allow yourself to be pressured into buying anything. Do your research first!].
  • Pay attention to others in your field - what are they doing and how? Where are they finding their clients, what events are they attending, who are they reaching out to?
  • Look for a mentor - could prove to be a big plus and you'll also have an immediate support system
The struggle can be so disgustingly real at times and you may want to quit before you've officially started, or soon after you go freelance so, always draw strength and inspiration from your passion, remember why you made the decision to go freelance and make sure you regularly weigh up the pro's and con's. You don't want to walk away from what you love so easily! Be patient.
FYI: I don't believe it's possible to freelance and have a full-time job long term - I mean, headache and stress much...? - However, it's defo possible to do so alongside a part-time contract. That said, be mindful of the fact that it isn't easy and freelancing is not likely to be lucrative for a while. Also, you'll want to create a positive, encouraging working environment for yourself and a strict schedule!

Visit Eventbrite [UK / USA etc.] and book anything that you believe will be valuable and is cost effective. Also search Google for more tips and additional freelancer support. 

The world of happiness comes from being able to successfully do your own thing and earn from it too but, it can be so dread at times! Isn't something to step into on a whim, that's for sure!!

Thank you for reading. 
I hope this post was helpful in some way. 

** HAPPY EASTER **


Scroll to the end of this page to listen to my radio show.... 

Sunday, 9 April 2017

THE BEST WAY TO REMOVE YOUR MAKEUP

'Minimal' is my favourite word. I rarely wear anything beyond cream and lip balm on my face and when I do apply anything, it is so basic; so little that it's more of a tint than it is a full on face paint! However, I've learned that [for me personally] the best way to remove it all is by following these quick easy steps which leave your skin feeling incredibly soft, fresh, alive [you know what I mean], able to breathe and extremely clean!

Step 1
I use the Boots Cucumber cleansing wipes to take off the make-up

Step 2
I then use a Johnson's baby wipe to restore moisture
Step 3
I then apply a very generous amount of the Boots Essentials Moisturising cream, which I mentioned in a previous post

Step 4
I leave the moisturising cream on [which has been massaged into/around my entire face] for about 2 - 4 minutes and then rinse off using warm water.

Step 5
I then give my face a quick rinse in cold water
Step 6
I reapply a small amount of the moisturising cream and ensure I work it into my face the same way I would with my lotion

Step 7
I then steam my face for 10 to 20 minutes - - - -
Boil the kettle, allow it to stand for 2 minutes, then pour the water into a suitable bowl [only halfway]. Place the bowl onto a hard surface [on a table at which you can sit comfortably works a treat] and then hang your head over the bowl ensuring you do not sink your face into the boiled water, of course and cover your head with a light weight towel. Once finished, I wrap the towel around my face and sit until it has almost cooled down

Step 8
I do another quick rinse with cold water, pat my face with a towel [do not dry completely] and then apply a small amount of my lotion/cream [I use Aqueous, or Germolene. Yes, the antiseptic cream!] and some lip balm
maybelline baby lips dr rescue too cool
TIP: If you wear make-up every day and feel this entire routine is a bit much to carry out before bed each night, do so on a Sunday but, apply a face mask beforehand! Primark have a great range [from just 80p at the time this article was published] for those on a budget!!

If you see improved results with this regime, 
do please share with others. Sharing is caring!! 😉

PREVIOUS POST: NUMBER ONE LIFE TIP! 

Scroll to the end of this page for the link to my radio show.... 

Sunday, 2 April 2017

NUMBER ONE LIFE TIP!

Do you know that "YOU ARE ENOUGH"? I hope you answer, "yes, I do" because, you are and, while it would be super lovely, you don't need for anyone to say it for you to know and believe it which is exactly what I Am Adored represents!

Founded by award-winning social entrepreneur and Marketing Executive Caroline Odogwu, this stand out collection of jewellery is a nod to female empowerment and aims to remind women everywhere that they are each uniquely made and adored. This, in fact, is true of everyone.

Prior to my interview with Caroline for Real Talk with Charley Jai on Shoreditch Radio [Wednesday 5th April 2017], I did a photoshoot wearing some of the gorgeous pieces from I Am Adored around London's trendy Notting Hill. For the official images please keep an eye on / visit the I Am Adored instagram account and website. 

Photography: Caroline Odogwu
Make-up [foundation only]: Sam Simon
Assistant: Brooke Berbaum [Intern for I Am Adored, January - April 2017]

Thanks for reading. 
Always remember that you truly are amazing and are more than enough, god bless x


Scroll to the end of this page for the link to my radio show.... 

Monday, 27 March 2017

4 OF MY BIGGEST MISTAKES!!

Relaxing My Hair
Relaxed hair, I should've cared! [Age 17 - 29]
I was 17, too quick to make decisions and STUPID!! A very good friend of my mother's who is a qualified and highly recommended hairdresser and stylist relaxed my hair and chopped it into a bob and I loved it! The quality of my natural hair is pretty decent and the length is too. It's just really fine.... Having had my hair treated professionally for a year, I was lazy one weekend and instead of going to the hairdresser, I decided to purchase a kit and relax my own hair. FLIPPING IMBECILE!!!! Left the mixture in for too long, the top of my head began to burn and I was left with 2 bald patches which have never fully recovered. Although I [even more stupidly] continued to have my hair relaxed on and off for some years after that traumatic incident, I've no intention of doing so again! Not only due to that experience but, the chemicals are likely to have a negative impact later on in life as I've learned through the stories of older women. Braiding using hair extensions is also a strain on natural hair and so, I'm now at the stage where I think, like most black women, I might return to the old school and will never be lazy with it!

A 'Beneficial' Friend 
Completely different from a one night stand, FWB [Friends With Benefits] enter into a non committed intimate sharing, for want of a better way of putting it, that is to be on a strictly casusal basis... The mistake I made was allowing this to happen with one of my closest and dearest male friends many, many years ago. It lasted so damn long [at least 2 years, I think] that it felt very much like an actual relationship which neither of us wanted at the time and it all got a little bit messy. Although we are no longer in contact, we're always civil if we see one another which is actually super rare. Getting involved intimately completely destroyed what had been such an amazingly beautiful friendship because, we didn't ever openly communicate to each other how the situation was making us feel! Suffice to say, I no longer have a problem speaking my mind!!

Taking A Job I Didn't Really Want 
As you may know, I frikkin LOVE to keep myself busy especially creatively and this once led me to pursue a role I knew I wasn't particularly keen on at a company I'd heard such bad things about. I sent in my application, was interviewed, offered the job and from day one was treated so badly [as were many before me]!! Little did I know this particular chapter in my life was to turn my resilience up a gear, reignite my passion for radio and have me discover hidden skills and qualities which have since helped massively with my creative endeavors. Everything really does happen for a reason.

Going Backwards
Leaving déja vu fm the first time was something I was so, so upset about as it was due to
At déja with former resident host Linda E
and current member Colin
poor health. Returning sometime later was incredibly frustrating because, I felt stuck. I just didn't feel as though I was growing, or developing and genuinely had no idea what to do, when and how. However, going back enabled me to see clearly my strengths as a presenter, the areas in which I needed to improve, what I didn't want for my show and for myself as a professional and the platform I would need to pursue next so as to progress in the way I had been craving! 
Sometimes what you consider to be your worst mistakes might just turn out to be your best lessons, or the most needed push in what is to be a much better direction! Life, ehy?

What about you? Can you relate? What mistakes have you made that later turned out to be a blessing?


Feel free to share this post and comment below :)

PREVIOUS POST: Mother's Day Gift Ideas

RADIO SHOW PODCAST below this page.... 

Sunday, 19 March 2017

MOTHER'S DAY GIFT IDEAS!!

In the UK, Mothering Sunday falls on the 26th of March 2017. If you're celebrating [be that with your mother, or in her memory] these suggestions might be right for the occasion, specially written for those with a limited budget!

TREATS

FOOD 
  • Afternoon Tea
  • Her favourtie restaurant - private area, special surprise cake etc
  • Bake and Dance - cake making to the backdrop of your mum's fave music!
  • Picnic - indoors if the weather isn't great - blanket on the floor of the largest room, nature CD in the background, pack of cards and a few other games etc

ACTIVITIES
  • Road trip
  • Create a picture album of your best times together 
  • Memory lane - visit the place, or places where you grew up 
  • Film a 'Mothers Day Q&A' video where you answer questions about each other, or a 'How Well Do You Really Know Your Daughter' tag [visual keepsake] 

CHEAP & CHEERFUL
  • Movies and Games [anytime of the day]
  • Indoor sports at your local leisure centre, or gym etc
  • Cook a fancy [ish] meal for your mother and her partner, or to enjoy with her closest friend / friends
  • Take a stroll around your local area / town / neighbourhood with a homemade coffee / tea / hot chocolate [obviously in a flask!]

It really doesn't matter what you choose to do, or how much money you actually spend. The most important thing is the giving of your time and to ensure it's quality!

Thanks for reading. Do let me know if you take any of these suggestions on board and how it goes!  
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!! x

Feel free to use the share buttons below to forward this article :)

PREVIOUS POSTLESSONS LEARNED!

RADIO SHOW PODCAST below this page.... 

Sunday, 12 March 2017

LESSONS LEARNED!

Not too long ago I felt as though I was a boxer taking on heavyweights without a coach to train and prepare me for the fights that were to leave me battered and bruised, albeit better for having stepped into the ring!

Last month I faced a few battles with someone I had become super fond of and therefore chose [wholeheartedly] to invest my time, expertise, trust and loyalty. The fallout with them [owing to, I believe, their pride and ego] led to a tizz with another individual [who had been a friend for more than 8 years] with whom I'd never even had a disagreement before!! In short, my investments, favours and support were taken for granted and standing up for myself was met with a huge amount of disrespect and shady antics. I then had quite a battle with myself because, I'm smart enough and real enough to check my part in every situation before I look at others. You know, I'm not perfect [go figure]... I have flaws, faults and negative characteristics just like everyone else in this imperfect world. However, I can admit that and then deal accordingly!! I'm honest about both my light and shade. I'm not a pretender; you'll always know where you stand with me!

Choosing to walk away is quite easy for me [not in a horrid way - I just refuse to stay anywhere that doesn't feel right]. However, I do tend to stay much longer than I know I should due to my instinctive desire to actually make things work and to also give a second, third and fourth chance [which I know I shouldn't do]. The fact is, sometimes our circumstances are not meant to improve in the way we believe they should, or would like. Their purpose is to teach us a lesson, or two and once learned we are to leave. The End.

The lessons learned / timely reminders:
1. I have never wanted to be a director
2. I have never wanted to be a scriptwriter
3. 'Friends' who get away with going behind your back once will defo do so again!!
4. NEVER invest too much too soon in anyone, or anything! 
5. Reflection is great, prayer is even better!
6. When things go wrong and you're looking for answers, start with you
7. Always be proud of yourself for being willing to try
8. Never wear more than 2 hats per project
9. Some people are really good at hiding their truth
10. A LOT OF PEOPLE PRESENT A FALSE 'IMAGE' ON SOCIAL MEDIA!!!!

At the time of publishing this post, it was confirmed that the short film Man I Use To Be will not be produced as it "doesn't meet the aim" of the co-owner whom the story is about; with it being decided that it was not worth trying to salvage :( Huge thanks to all who were in full support of this project. It's possible the co-owner will remain in contact with the cast and create something fresh at a later date. 

This is the original trailer:


Thank you for reading. I sincerely hope you understand this post and find it helpful in some way. There will never be a time in your life that you cannot learn from so, remain open to seeing who you truly are as a person and as a professional, a friend, partner, parent etc. Be brutally honest with yourself and don't hold on so tight to pride and ego that you fail to change and adapt where and when it is necessary so that you can become the best you could possibly be. Also, a grudge will always be a silly thing to carry around with you, the same goes for regret! The best thing you can ever do for yourself is: know your worth and refuse to settle for being treated in any way that puts a dent in your value. 


Feel free to use the share buttons below to forward this article :)

PREVIOUS POST: EXCITING NEWS!!

RADIO SHOW PODCAST below this page.... 

Sunday, 5 March 2017

EXCITING NEWS!!

I'm extremely proud to have partnered with some wonderful, innovative brands whom I'll be showcasing via my platforms. The aim is to help raise the profiles of emerging talents through radio interviews, blog features and the alike. Why? Well, because, I can and it’s what [I believe] we should all be doing if we have the means. I didn't want to collaborate with a view to earning. This is simply about supporting those who are positively driven; who are making a significant difference to the lives of others. 

NOTHING CLOTHING COMPANY
I absolutely adore what this business represents. Founded in 2014 by a man with an empowering story, Nothing Clothing Company is focused on "coming together to change lives" and they do this by working with those who are like-minded to raise awareness of amazing charities and causes in line with their own ethos, as well as individuals such as myself with a platform that has a similar aim.

Marketed as a 'premier good-cause fashion company', their generous donations to those in need make them a stand out brand in an industry driven by financial gain as opposed to the desire to give. With a simple but unique logo that everyone from your grandparents to mainstream personalities around the world are wearing, or want to wear, this truly is a remarkable brand that makes everyone feel amazing! It's an absolute joy to be part of what is such a brilliant, worthwhile, authentic and giving company. 

My line will be a casual range, very me, consisting of the sample hoodie pictured, jogging bottoms, t-shirts and vests. I'm too frikkin' excited!! Oh. My. Life!! God is so, so great!

Gary Scales, the director, was a guest on my radio show [Wednesday 1st March 2017]. Have a listen to his interview for more information about how the company was founded and is funded etc by clicking the logo!



Connect with NOTHING CLOTHING COMPANY on twitter and instagram and if you would like to collaborate with me in some way, perhaps to host your event, or join forces on promoting a fabulous brand / cause etc, please email: realtalkuk_creative@outlook.com 

In other equally EXCITING news:
I've been nominated for a Divas of Colour award 2017 in the presenter category! [Don't watch the incorrect spelling of my surname in that screen shot image of the email I received, ha-ha]. I mean, WOW!!!! This is SUPER fab because, this nomination in itself is a win! It's all about the recognition!! I wholeheartedly appreciate my skills, work ethic and achievements etc being recognised and appreciated! Click on the email to see my nominee photo!! :D

Thanks for reading and for your support. 

PREVIOUS POST: NOT IN MY CLOSET!

Scroll to the end of this page to listen to my radio show!! 

Sunday, 26 February 2017

NOT IN MY CLOSET!

I've had too many people - friends, family, even strangers - comment over the years about my "Mary Poppins trunk" [owing to how much I carry about and the things I keep with me] that I thought I'd do a short post listing the essential items in my handbag. I've tagged / linked the items I forgot to photograph. 


This is the absolute truth and nothing but! LOL!! 

First of all, I don't actually carry a huge bag around unless necessary and recently purchased a cute little all-black convenience bag from Primark for £7 which I frikkin' LUV!




Keys
Mints
Gloves
Mini purse
MP3 player
Olbas stick
Hand cream



Oyster card
Toiletries bag
Sanitary case
Chewing gum
Hand sanitizer
1-2 carrier bags
Mini first-aid kit
Hand & face wipes

Multi-purpose purse


I'd luv to know what you carry around with you everyday! What are your must-have daily bits and bobs that you cannot leave home without? Comment below x

PREVIOUS POST: 21st Relationship Guide

Scroll to the end of this page for the link to my radio show!! 


Sunday, 19 February 2017

21st Century Relationship 'Guide'

I wrote the title of this post and immediately burst out laughing!! If you've read my 2 previous articles, you'll understand why, LOL!! 

Nowadays it would seem that a lot of us get so involved almost immediately after we meet somebody new which can bring everything to an abrupt end before anything has even really begun so, this list may be The One! It might also make you giggle! :p
Also, there's a video for you at the end ;)


1. Do not follow each other on social media

2. Do not spy each other's social media

3. Do not get to know one another's friends on a personal level

4. Do not get super close to his / her family, or pets

5. Do not spend 24/7 together 

6. Do not try to change for them

7. Do not try to change them

8. Do not get too close too soon

9. Do not fart in their company

10. Do not use the toilet in front of them

11. Do not get too comfortable

12. Do not become complacent

13. Do not behave in any way that you'd not appreciate them behaving

14. Do not have any expectations, EVER!

..............................................................................................................

He will sometimes try to sell a product to you at the end however, his messages before that point are quite spot on so, take a look at the ['Red Flag...'] video below. I hope it positively inspires you somehow where your relationships [of all types] are concerned.


Thanks for reading, folks. Feel free to leave a comment / reaction below.

PREVIOUS POST: VALENTINE'S DAY SORTED!

Scroll to the end of this page for the link to my radio show!!

Friday, 10 February 2017

VALENTINE'S DAY SORTED!

In a relationship? Great! You're good to go - it'll be dinner, cinema, a romantic walk, drinks at a bar somewhere decorated with all things red and hearts, or a cosy night in designed to have the obvious happen.. Perhaps all of the above and then some if you're being spoilt, LOL!

Single and without [any available] friends to enjoy the day / evening with to distract from being alone on Valentine's Day? Keep reading....

I don't have the answers to every question I'm asked but, I'm always happy to try to help. "Charley, what can I do on Valentine's Day to stop myself feeling glum?". Once again, for me, it's simple. I don't succumb to the money making scam at all! It's just another day that has been tagged as being something we must all 'buy' into. Literally!

This year V-Day falls on a weekday and so, you might be at work [which could be a big enough distraction], or you may feel too tired after being on the job to be concerned with any evening plans. However, here's a list of things you can do [during the day, or night] which may prevent you from feeling all doom and gloom on February 14th!

Bake some goodies and deliver to the homeless in your area
Arrange a family get together [with those who are also single]
Start the planning process of a project you've wanted to get off the ground
Find out if your solo elderly neighbours want some company on the day too!
Begin reading the book you've been putting off [unless it's a romance novel]
Indulge in a hot bath, feel-good music [no romantic songs] and some bubbly
Spend the day sightseeing - wherever you live - and discover some new things
Have a clear out - sort out your cupboards, wardrobes etc and get rid of the clutter
Watch that DVD, film, or programme you've been meaning to watch, or catch up on
See if there are any local events for singles that may be of interest to you - go along without any expectations and treat it as a bit of a business opportunity [network]

Don't pressure yourself and try not to get bogged down with thoughts about 'being alone' on Valentine's Day. It really isn't that deep at all. Celebrate the love you have for yourself; your achievements to date and all that you have overcome thus far. Put a new spin on V-Day, think of it as 'Love Day' meaning: to love God, oneself, family, friends and all others. The name of the day is a firm fixture, how you feel about it can change whenever you're ready.


HAPPY LOVE DAY a.k.a Valentine's Day 
a.k.a Nonsense Money Making Scam Day!

              Thanks for reading, hope it's been helpful....?


You're more than welcome to leave a comment, question, or share your own thoughts on Valentine's Day below. Please subscribe and share. It's always good to connect x 

PREVIOUS POST: VALENTINE CHARLEY

Scroll to the end of this page for the link to my radio show!! 

Sunday, 5 February 2017

VALENTINE CHARLEY

This is a question a number of people have asked me too many rarted times!...... “How are you so happy being single, Charley?” Choopse! Damn cheek!! Lol!

First of all, that sort of question tells me way too much about those who ask [ahem], secondly, I'm living [that's how] and am excited by the daily blessings, challenges, opportunities and every other positive aspect of my life. That's not to say I am finding ways of keeping busy so as to distract myself from not having a partner [so don't even come at me with that], I just really, really enjoy having lots to do and fulfillment, for me, has never truly come from having that so-called special someone in my life. Such people have added to my happiness however, they are certainly not the reason for my happiness. Plus, the solo-ship enables me to get to know myself in a way that I have never found possible when in a relationship, which I'm loving. The End!! However, continue reading because, the following may be of use to you if you're without a partner and find life in the single lane a little difficult.

GET ON WITH TICKING YOUR BOXES
Professional / career pursuits
Personal goals
Study a new subject
Explore a new city

GET YOUR SOCIAL ANTICS ON
Meet-up’s with friends
Go on spontaneous day trips
Join a gym
Take up a new hobby

GET ON BOARD THE SELF APPRECIATION TRAIN
Take your time getting to know yourself
Check your faults / flaws and look at where you can / need to improve
Establish your short term goals [which can change depending on a new opportunity] 
Learn to be comfortable with you – your own company, who you are as a person, talent etc

GET SOME PERSPECTIVE
It would seem that a lot of people place HUGE importance on a ‘need’ to find their ‘perfect’ partner and settle down. Personally, that would be really nice [we all want that] but, I am not at all desperate nor in a rush to meet someone with whom I might enter into a long term committed relationship. At the time of sharing this post, I am more concerned with the relationship I’m having with myself. 

I think independence, self-worth, positive people [close friends, family and the alike] and environments are what you should be indulging in whilst single. Try to keep the company of those whose values and standards match your own especially when it comes to your spiritual, mental and emotional well-being. The impact of the beliefs and opinions of others can make such a difference to the type of people you meet and welcome into your life. Be conscious of that.

Try not to allow yourself to be so easily influenced, or pressured into ‘finding’ yourself a partner. Life is too short to waste it on the search for your 'other half' when you have yet to get things right with who you are and achieve your [short term career, or personal] goals. No matter how long it takes, I genuinely believe that, eventually we each meet [organically] The One with whom we are compatible. BE patient, stay active and remain hopeful. You're so deserving of true love and it will come your way when you quit desperately calling it to arrive.

You're more than welcome to leave a comment, question, or share your thoughts below. Please subscribe and share. It's always good to reach out x 

PREVIOUS POST: BEAUTY SECRETS

Scroll to the end of this page for the link to my radio show!! 

Sunday, 29 January 2017

BEAUTY SECRETS

“Your skin is so nice, Charley! What is your secret?” I rarely wear any makeup, when I do it is very minimal and to remove it I use the most basic yet effective product! Here’s a brief summary of what ‘potions’ I use on my scalp/hair, my face, hands and body.

SCALP/HAIR
Once a week I massage into my scalp a tiny bit of the Blue Magic coconut oil hair conditioner, or the Blue Magic Organics super sure gro. Twice a week I spray my scalp with a homemade conditioner [olive oil, shea butter and jojoba]. These treatments keep my scalp and hair hydrated, prevent itching, promote growth, health and smell fab so, although I wear braids [the best protective style, for me personally], my hair always looks and feels healthy!

FACE
DAILY: See the Love Your Face post for my cleansing regime.

MAKEUP: Occasionally I paint my face [depending on the agenda for the day] using a few basic products [as I am never going for an OTT look] and have listed *below the products I use. To remove the makeup, I use fragrance free baby wipes [Johnson’s, or Huggies because, they’re not at all harsh against my skin] and once removed, I then apply the cucumber moisturising cream which I then wash off with luke warm water after which I then use a tiny bit of aqueous cream [E45] on my face.
*
Sleek foundation
Sleek concealer
NYX mascara
Mac lipstick

HANDS 
I use another homemade remedy [a mix of high street purchases] for my hands as they can be quite dry! Lavender, shea butter, baby oil, aqueous cream, snow fairy body conditioner and olive oil are mixed into a pleasantly fragranced [and crusty hands friendly] potion that brings the most amount of joy to my hands! 

BODY 
When at home, as in, unless I stay at someone’s house, or I am abroad, I literally moisturise my body just after I step out of the shower as I have found that to be best [for me]. During the winter I use a mix of aqueous cream and baby oil combined into one pot. During the summer, I use aqueous and cocoa butter, again mixed together. 

There you have it – basic methods to look after my skin that work a treat and have done for years. I have never felt the need to spend hundreds on so-called ‘fix it’ products to retain a healthy body etc! More time, the ingredients in such items are likely to be the reason our skin isn’t looking so well. Sometimes, less really is more!! 

Thanks for reading, genuinely hope this has been helpful.

You're more than welcome to leave a comment, question, or share your own beauty secrets below. Please subscribe and share. It's always good to connect x 

PREVIOUS POST: FIBROID TUMORS: UPDATE

Scroll to the end of this page for the link to my radio show!! 

Sunday, 22 January 2017

FIBROID TUMORS: 2017 Update

In November 2015 I talked about being diagnosed with fibroids and I explained what they are in my Body Issue post. Thought I'd give you an update as to how I'm getting on in the hope that I can further help anyone else dealing with these tummy monsters and / or inform those who've yet to learn about them.

Personally, it has helped significantly to persevere with my improved lifestyle [following extensive research] and I think it’s super important for me to share what I have learned and changed, or implemented plus the results I have seen, with you all.

REMOVED FROM MY DIET [a select few]:
Dairy
Pasta
Fizzy drinks
Juice [except for watered down orange juice now and then]

INCLUDED IN MY DIET [a select few]:
Kale
Spinach
Almond nuts
Herbal teas [mostly peppermint and green tea]


You may notice that my tummy is flatter and more toned in the 2015 photo and that is because, dealing with fibroids is like being in your monthly cycle [ladies] permanently without the actual flow [if you get me]. Fibroids grow when they want and the battle with watching what I eat and maintaining daily exercise to help reduce the growth of my fibroids [I have more than 1] so that I do not look pregnant is too damn real!

THE CAUSE: Further research last year taught me that high estrogen levels are the problem and certain foods are the culprits! It is that damn simple yet the doctors, consultants and nurses with whom I had too many appointments [here in the UK] chose not to give me this information and I can only conclude that this is because, it doesn’t pay to cure sick people…

Last year I also began looking into alternative products [non environmental estrogento use for cleaning my home and those I may use on a day to day basis [such as plastic] which is incredibly difficult!

MY EXERCISE ROUTINE: Check out my Body Issue post to find out which exercises I follow every morning. The mornings are better for me but, you can, of course, exercise anytime that suits you. I like to attend classes at Pure Gym as well whenever I can. 

Male, or female and irrespective of your age etc, if you experience any type of unfamiliar pain in your stomach [or anywhere in your body for that matter] make every effort to note down exactly what the pain feels like and any associated symptoms then ask google, real talk, to help give you an idea of what you might be dealing with before you visit your GP. You can then take your findings with you to your doctor and insist that the necessary tests are carried out to determine the cause of the problem. I waited years for a diagnosis only to then be offered a high risk, invasive surgical option yet there are far less invasive treatments that, if given early, can have a huge positive effect. It isn't about any type of surgery, or pills for me. Once upon a time humans lived without any dependency on chemicals to 'cure' themselves. Why is this now a thing of the past?



Apparently, once I turn 40 my estrogen levels will decrease and with it the tumors will supposedly shrink. God willing, this will definitely happen [if not before] and I can live fibroid free. In the meantime, having seen such amazing results and feeling the best I have felt in years [since being diagnosed], I will be sticking with my new lifestyle and will continue to improve however I can. Only 4 years to go! Bring it on!!

Thanks for reading, genuinely hope this has been helpful and insightful to you.

You're more than welcome to leave a comment, question, or share your own stories below. 
Please subscribe and share. Let's raise awareness and help one another x 

PREVIOUS POST: NEW BLOGGER ON THE BLOCK!

Scroll to the end of this page for the link to my radio show!!