Sunday, 28 December 2014

LUCKY DIP!

The title of this post is exactly how life is... "You win some, you lose some", right?

"PEE OFF!" is something I could have said on so many occasions this year to a number of people who either took, or attempted to take, the ultimate piss for no good reason other than because, that’s just how they roll.

The Beginning
Between the months of January and April 2014 I didn’t know whether I was about to lose my mind, seriously, or if the things I were going through were part of a bigger and better picture. Such was the extent of these things that I often asked myself, “Why do you even bother? Why do what you do when it’s clearly taking its toll?” I literally could not find an answer and, with me, no answer means ‘you better keep going until you get an answer’ so, that’s what I did. Remaining positive, staying focused, working towards my bigger picture, I simply carried on in the direction I was heading. 


The Change
As the end of April approached I suddenly felt very different! You know those random good feelings? Something completely indescribable yet at the same time it has you buzzing; you’re excited and you feel that you know for sure things are about to improve? That was me and I took that feeling and ran with it into the month of May!! Up to this day though, I’ve no idea where that feeling came from nor can I pinpoint it however, I remember it clearly and I'm glad I chose to embrace it because, looking back, it was to be the positive energy I would need to get through some tough times!

Random Step
Following on from May 2014, the month of June was the most exciting month to date! Opportunities and reconnections galore and I was (and still am) so very grateful!! As most know, alongside my creative endeavors, I was looking for some office work to top up my income and this box was about to be ticked in the shape of a media company based in West London and, although I’d not heard of them, having done my research, they appeared to be top notch!! I felt so, so blessed!

The Battle
I walked in to the media company, on my first day in July 2014, feeling super-duper elated! To start something new and embrace all that was to follow was my only goal. With this particular job, being that it was a side earner and  not one from which I wanted to make a career, I chose to take it on with a laid back approach; with a hugely open mind and, Thank Jah that I did… This company was to try every last bit of patience I had and also sit on each and every one of my nerves until it had grind them down and all in the shape of one particular female employee almost 11 years my junior! Although advertised as an Office Manager ‘type’ role, the company wanted a somewhat mute cleaner who was ‘happy’ to simply be at the beck and call of more than 80 members of staff, 5 days a week, full-time, to include cleaning up after them all – literally! Now, far from it being beneath me to do the job of a cleaner (never that), it simply isn’t a role that I have ever pursued nor would it be. Why? Because, it doesn’t interest me in the slightest and owing to certain health conditions it isn’t one I could do even if I wanted to. On top of this, the female member of staff in question who, as suggested by too many who work at the company, seemed to find my efficiency and expertise to be of a level which highlighted her flaws and failings, made every attempt to show me as being unsuitable for the job; to discredit my good nature and strong work ethic which I found shocking because, she was in a much more senior role! Why she found me to be a threat I don't know. This child was impossible in every way you could think of! Having experienced the loss of 2 incredible people this year – a good friend and my dearest grandpa who I am still struggling to accept is gone – I could have so easily switched in that place, taking out every frustration and upset on said female who was aware of me having had a friend pass away!! This young female was horrid and impossible to work with or be around.
Such was also the experience of other members of staff (some of whom have since left the company). However, far from offer snide remarks as some low level form of retaliation, I chose to quiet my mind and calm my upset. In fact, I actually felt bad for her and prayed that she will one day realise her own greatness (as we all need to) so she can feel comfortable and confident wherever she is, whatever she is doing, regardless of those she is to be around and, of course, do so genuinely. In taking on such an approach one of my own valuable lessons was reinforced: Let nobody claim power over the ways of your heart. Suffice to say, I no longer work for that company! It was toxic (due to the cover up of several wrongdoings and other shady behaviour), caused me to be unwell, had me feel like I physically understood what it means to be a ‘modern day slave’ and, with it all firmly behind me, I now look forward to the next step in this here thing called “life”. Despite having given more than what was both asked and expected of me, I was taken for granted, victimized, made to feel somewhat inadequate and therefore found no enjoyment in the job with the media company beyond some of the many friendly people I met. So glad to have left that place following a difficult year wrapped in too many bad memories… Bring on 2015!!! I’m both ready and excited for whatever awaits me!!!! Best of all, I feel my experience at the media company has equipped me with a stronger resilience, tolerance and strength which I will no doubt need to apply somewhere down the line so, all in all, I am incredibly grateful for my time there!

Beautiful Chapter
In and amongst the chaos and sadness between summer and winter, I found solace in the most unlikely person ever! I’ve blogged about my connection with this individual before however; I’ve not once named them. Despite this here explicit blog (somewhat), both this person and I are actually rather private people.
Although, like near enough everyone in the world, this individual was going through their own battle they did all they could to be there for me – with comfort, surprise evenings out, the occasional visit armed with plenty hugs, an attentive ear and words of encouragement to uplift me and remind me that I will always only ever be human and in all things can only do my very best! To say that I am so overly grateful for this person doesn’t even scratch the surface of what I feel for them. We all need that one constant and consistent someone in our lives who knows when to step in, step up or step down. God has well and truly blessed me with my own earth-angel.

CHOICE
Far from give up or give in, here I am trying once again to simply do the best that I can with what I have to achieve all that I have set out to accomplish. Sometimes, honestly, I wish that it was within my nature to just stop! To let it all go and just settle for whatever however, I wasn’t raised that way. My mother taught me that to exist is not what we were born to do. To live and to enjoy that life is a natural, blessed purpose given to us by Jehovah God and how very dare we take such an opportunity for granted by not trying to live a great and joyful life? So, here’s to working towards new goals with new steps in place as I also take on an amazing opportunity following my departure from that awful job! I’m super happy to be walking out of 2014 with a clear conscience, a forgiving heart, a focused mind, a new found strength/resilience, the benefits of lessons learned, a healthy attitude and a fierce determination. While I did tick many boxes in 2014, there are those still pending so, I’ve still quite a bit of work to do which I always welcome!!

UNSURE
I haven’t been posting as frequently as I did when I first launched the blog and that is both due to being busy and also not always feeling as inspired…
Hopefully that changes and for those who have remained supportive and quite like reading my diary (lol), I’ll endeavor to post more often. Concerning The Real Talk TV Series UK there will be a vlog update posted to the channel (link above the title of this post) informing all of what is to happen with the project in the New Year.

The End
For as long as we are alive there can be no end so, actually, this is a new beginning – new challenges and opportunities, renewed faith and renewed hope. I'm in a fab place and ready to explore my new chapter!! :D

MY Key Lesson in 2014
You’re not only as good as your last; you’re as good as what you believe your next will be! – Sometimes, for all of your efforts, the natural order of what is meant to be is simply too strong a force to outdo!! Best form of defense, or rather protection? Positive thinking!!!

My 2014 summary in pics!

There is no challenge in life that you cannot take on and should you choose, you will succeed with all and overcome each struggle as though it is merely water off a ducks back!
Remember: whether you believe in him or not, God is always with you…

SPECIAL THANKS TO family & friends:
Isaak Badru (for support on that day)
Jimmy Akingbola (for support on that day)
Francis Joani (for your care and consideration)
My Joanne Sandi and Caroline Odogwu (good friends)
Nev G (for support, words of comfort & encouragement during that time)

SPECIAL THANKS TO those who made a difference:
Hazel Chapiwa (for not giving up on me)
Jameel Rahman (for every offer to make me a cup of tea even though I declined)
My Jessie Stone (for your comfort, jokes, understanding & heavy footsteps – you’re fab!)

Kimba! You already know, girl!! x

Theatre Royal; Stratford East, the broadway Barking Theatre and Studio 3 Arts
(for providing filming space for The Real Talk TV Series UK!!! x)

The RTTVS Team, always!! x


HAPPY NEXT STEP, FOLKS!!! Cheers to 2015!! x

Wednesday, 19 November 2014

DEAR BROTHER...

"There are certain artists who belong to all the people, everywhere, all the time"
Maya Angelou

Dearest Joe, 
It is with some sadness that I write this however; often I smile as I ponder the memories. Although on a number of occasions I thanked you and told you just how grateful I am to you for having given me such a mahoosive opportunity in bringing me on board at déjà vu with The Real Talk Radio Show UK, I was too busy playing ‘bad gyal’ (ahem) at times to actually tell you in detail just how much your belief and confidence means to me and the impact your support has had.

JOE & I - RTRUK - FORMER DÉJÁ STUDIO

Dearest brother,
If not for you there would only exist “that Real Talk Charley woman”. Instead, because of you, I have added to my little legacy a radio show, live hosting and that of an on-screen project in the shape of The Real Talk TV Series UK and it looks like there may be other brilliant offers on the horizon! (God willing).

JOE AT THE NLPR EVENT - STAND4SOMETHING: MORE THAN LIPGLOSS!
“All Great artists draw from the same resource: the human heart, which tells us all that we are more alike than we are unalike” – 
Maya Angelou

Joe, one of my little-big brothers you were (still are) and with you, even though we would disagree on so much, it was all healthy debates not fallout’s, conscious speaking not ill words over things we knew we could not change, plus jokes about Dr Phil (Reveal mag) each and every Tuesday live on air albeit with compassion towards those who sought his ‘help’. The laughter we shared was amazing and although at times doing the radio show stressed us both, we always came through on air after you would deliver some motivational talk! Over biscuits and sweets, tea and the odd soft drink, or a chip roll after a show, we had many conversations where we shared details of our aspirations, our journey so far and a desire to bring others on board for the ride. You instilled so much faith in me, gave me so many reasons to smile (and complain, lol), had my back with my endeavours and always made sure that I was okay irrespective of what you might have been going through yourself - Mr Always Maintain A Positive Outlook! That's you!! x

JOE WITH SOME OF HIS 'BROTHERS' (L-R): TEE J, FRANCIS, JASON YORK, KIELL, ASHLEY J

Dearest Joe,
The way you have made so many proud of you, given great opportunities, inspired, encouraged and uplifted us all. Your beyond beautiful children and wife have always been such a huge credit to you and you to them! As I've said to you way too many times, ha-ha; “you four are too gorgeous, I love your little family”.

JOE WITH HIS WIFE, 'CHELLE

Dearest brother,
I expected nothing less than a grand and special service, a huge turnout, BIG riddims courtesy of your awesome self and feel-good food to praise, celebrate and give thanks for your life! I'll try not to miss you because, I will forever remember you. I’m so grateful and motivated by what you have left for us all – music, passion to support others, a top up of self-belief, your gorgeous family, the open doors, great memories and then some; you definitely left your mark and with it touched the hearts of many who, I'm sure, will carry you with them. Always...
        
JOE WITH HIS 'BROTHER' TEEJ (L) + HIS BEST FRIEND AND 'BROTHER' MATTHEW AKA IRATE
The human heart is so delicate and sensitive that it always needs some tangible encouragement to prevent it from faltering in its labour. The human heart is so robust, so tough, that once encouraged it beats its rhythm with a loud unswerving insistency. One thing that encourages the heart is music” – Maya Angelou

My darling Joe, thank you. “It’s all love, man!”

Char xXx
JOE & I HAVING ONE OF MANY LAUGHS AFTER A SHOW! - RTRUK, FORMER DÉJÁ STUDIO
Joe's 2 favourite Real Talk Radio UK shows!
(1) with special guest, novelist Courttia Newland:
(2) with former Young Mayor of Lewisham, Jacob Sakil:

Joseph Steven Kendrick aka Joe Grime
11th May 1986 - 4th November 2014

Some images taken by myself. Others taken from social media.

Wednesday, 22 October 2014

MY DATE with CONCEPT!

They're a super talented bunch of friends who collectively are a vocal force to be reckoned with! Charismatic, incredibly hard-working and well on their way to stardom, I caught up with Ben Selley, Nathan Gittens, Karim Newton, Scott Dicks and Matt Goodenough who are members of the boy-band Concept!

When was the band formed?
We first formed the band in November 2010, we started as a 4 then 6 months later Ben started playing guitar for us. We then officially became a 5 in September 2011. It's been an incredible journey.

How have you funded the development of the band?
We've been self funded from the start, even till now, we use our own money and the money we generate from gigs. Occasionally we ask our parents for support but that's become a very rare occurrence, we're all grown up now. It's been tough supporting ourselves but it's definitely taught us loads of valuable lessons. The struggle is all part of the journey to success. 




Which one of you is the heart-breaker?
The heart-breaker.. That's a good question. We're not really heart breakers, we're more likely to get our hearts broken. We're pretty good at that. If we had to name a person as chief heart-breaker, it could possibly be Karim but none of us tend to. Which is strange to think. We're all good boys I guess.




What level of comfortable are you with each otherA) Fart level, B) Morning breath level, C) Hugs and kisses level, D) None of the above? - If none of the above, why boys? Get down with some group love!
We are comfortable to the extreme, just imagine what you're like around your brothers and sisters. That's us! Sometimes we feel like we may spend a little too much time together because, morning breath and farting around each other should have never be okay! Ever!! We reached a high level of comfort a while ago, we're family so we're used to everything. There's some hilarious stories.. But we won't share those with you.

Oh! No fair... Choopse! Okay, so, describe your X Factor experience:
It's basically like putting your emotions through an intense workout for an entire day! Every single emotion you could think of is doing something inside your head, at any given time. You go from happy to sad to excited to anxious. It's so confusing. Overall the experience was phenomenal and worth while but sometimes, at points, we just wanted to shut down, sleep and see our families. That's just the nature of the industry we're in. It's got it's major highs and major lows. We wouldn't change a thing though. 

Concept auditioned for X Factor 2014. Check out the judges reaction to their audition here:

Finish this sentence: Louis Walsh is.. 
A very funny guy. A great laugh.. Poor decision maker though.. Just kidding, well kind of. We got on really with him and we were fortunate to get his advice. He's got a massive amount of experience and knowledge. So... Thanks Louis. We'll forget the whole "no" thing in Bermuda shall we, let's just move on ;) Friends?!



Success depends entirely on supporters. Do you have a unique/special way you thank your fans?
We've created a close bond with our fans, they're more like our friends than fans. We feel that makes the difference. We love them. Thank you for all the support.



Aww, that's so sweet! So, what's next for Concept?
Music music music! Going to write some original material to give to the people, it's been a while since we gave our fans something new. Then some tours and more. Travelling Europe, Asia and the US, among other places. We're feeling great, we have a lot on the horizon that we can't wait to tell you! For now though, it's all top secret. So shhhhh....


Since appearing on The X Factor, Concept have given a number of interviews (including This Morning, ITV as seen in the photo below), continued to boost their profile via social media and have been working super duper hard on making their mark in the music industry! Watch more than this space folks, GET BEHIND THEM and support their journey!! 



Each answer appears as they were delivered by the band


CHECK OUT THEIR OFFICIAL WEBSITEhttp://www.conceptofficial.co.uk/  

Tuesday, 30 September 2014

THE HAPPY PILL!

If there was a drug you could take that would make you eternally happy, would you take it? What if I told you that we were all born with this drug; that it lives just below your heart and at any moment you can get a fix? Would you believe me? Let me explain how you can get a dose of this internal high…

ONE – as you are (with or without make-up, clothes, hair done etc, in private of course) stand in front of your most revealing mirror and take in all that you see; all that you are exactly as you see yourself.

TWO – starting from your eyes right down to your hands, analyse what you see; what emotion do your eyes display? Are your lips pursed and intimidating, or are they relaxed and inviting wholesome conversation? What type of vibe do you give off; is your posture warm or ice cold? Are your hands clenched into a tight fist full of tension, or calm and welcoming? 


THREE – as you stand facing your mirror image, break yourself down with questions: if I met someone who looked like this person staring back at me in the mirror what would I think of them and how would being around them make me feel?

FOUR – give yourself an honest evaluation of your appearance: what does it say about you, your expression: does it warn people off, or does it encourage a smile? and the way you hold yourself: are you a closed book, or happy to meet new people?

FIVE – take yourself through a complete psychological makeover by speaking at the mirror (essentially to yourself) the positive outcome of your self assessment starting each sentence with, “I am” as you focus entirely on the positives! E.G. “I am good, I am radiant, I am friendly, I am humble and confident”.

SIX – meditate! Reflect on the positives you have found in the breakdown you have just given yourself; embrace the greatness that you are and fully release the good energy you possess and as you do let happiness wash over you because, happy is he who has finally realised and accepted that to be happy is to first understand that it is a choice and one which you have complete control over for it is a state of mind, like a pill that actually does nothing for you but, because you believe it will, once you take it you suddenly feel better. {The placebo effect also known as ‘mind over matter’} 

There you have it! It’s that simple to get hold of your unlimited and free supply of Happy Pills!!! Go lock yourself away and overdose on all things positive! Get your Zen on!! Happy pill popping, folks! 

PS. There is nothing you will go through that you cannot overcome unless you choose not to!

Think Good, Live Good!
Don’t mind yourself with what doesn't matter! Place your focus on all that makes your heart glad, your lips smile and will keep you positively high!!


IMAGES TAKEN FROM GOOFLE

Check out my 
NEW YOUTUBE SHOW - OUT NOW!!! Feedback welcome, please subscribe too!

Thursday, 31 July 2014

BEING UNEMPLOYED

The way those on benefits are portrayed is about 3 things:
  1. The perception of those who've never been unemployed/on benefits
  2. The media’s immediate dismissal of such persons
  3. The fact that some claimants do actually refuse to seek work
I wonder, though, if anyone (especially those who fit into category 1 and 2) has ever sought to find out why there are a number of people who choose to remain unemployed, not via some over hyped, un-informative TV programme with a degrading title but, honest reasons from the relevant claimants with details of what led them to make such a choice. The DWP (Department of Work and Pensions) hand out around £145.00 per fortnight to each job seeker and in this day and age we all know that is nowhere near enough for anyone to live on irrespective of their age, class, gender, family background etc. So, why do some in receipt of benefits admittedly claim by choice?

While there are likely to be many reasons, a high proportion of which will probably be unjustified, in response to the above question, being unemployed (especially in this day and age) through no fault of your own is nothing to be ashamed of! But, whether unemployed and on benefits or just unemployed, despite the current economic issues being faced worldwide, jobs are about and there is definitely one for you!!!

With or without skills, qualifications and experience, the job market is the toughest it has been in years and it does take an awful lot to persist! But, like with all things, if you really want to find work you will!

Here are some of my successful methods to get you a job:

FULL-TIME JOB SEEKER
Although difficult, if you do not make the job of being unemployed your full-time job you are likely to miss a great opportunity! The moment you become complacent is the moment a great chance at something amazing may pass you by. Have a schedule, draft action plans, set deadlines and commit full-time to achieving your goal of finding the right job for you.

UNBREAKABLE MINDSET
“Think good, live good” has been my motto for a few years now and it really does work! Visualize the finish line and be proactive in your search for work. If you do not choose to be productive and positive about your future prospects your situation will remain the same.


STRATEGIES

  • A winning CV includes the necessary information about your work history and will detail your most recent and credible job roles, attributes and the alike to include any relevant achievements such as ongoing systems you may have implemented whilst appointed in a particular role.
  • Cold-calls to businesses are often thought to be somewhat prehistoric… Erm, hardly! Giving a call to the HR department of any company to make pre-application inquiries may very well work in your favour. You will be demonstrating an early interest and they might just recognise your name when they receive your CV / application. Check www.yell.com and get calling!!
  • *Tailoring your CV to each job role is such an arduous task but, doing so will have you stand out from the hundreds applying for the same role. Although always best to present an honest CV, you are better off listing matching skills as outlined in the job spec of that which you are applying for.
  • *Buzz words are what employers / HR look out for so, note the key attributes they have listed in the job spec and include these in your covering letter as part of your personality descriptive where applicable.

  • Your covering letter should be in the correct (letter) format, in basic font that is no smaller than size 11 and must be brief! No employer / HR person will read an essay detailing (very unnecessarily) your life story!! Be formal, show that you have researched the role and ensure you state your reason for applying.
  • Speculative job applications are a long, drawn-out process but, again, another strategy that I, myself, have found great success with! Google companies whose business is in line with the type of work you want to do, find out who the manager / HR manager is and target them by addressing a letter to them putting yourself forward for any foreseeable prospective vacancies. Be clear about what type of role you see yourself in and ensure you attach your CV! ;)
  • You’ve heard of business cards, right? If not, boi… I’m not sure what to say about that! Well, once when unemployed, I created my very own 'Job Seeker' Card which, much like a business card, listed my contact details, the job role I was seeking, a few of my top key skills and my availability which I handed out to potential employers at various events at any given opportunity.
  • Being a busy-bee is also a great way of finding work as well as improving your social life. Not every step beyond our front door is going to cost a fortune! There are many events happening in and around the world which are free to attend. Yes, you need to arrange your own travel to and from such places (as is the case when going anywhere) but, the potential rewards once there are so valuable!! Talking to people with a genuine, laid back, honest approach about your current work status and near future goals may see you employed much sooner than you had hoped for. Be confident in yourself as a person and as a future employee. That type of confidence will work in your favour. We’re all encouraged by those who are tenacious!
  • Always dress the part! While we all like to let ourselves go now and then, when seeking work, you need to be readily available for any opportunity that may come your way. You could meet someone today who happens to be the CEO of a big firm who is due to advertise for an exec role. However, even if you have confidently approached this person (not knowing, of course, who they are), your appearance could put them off from having a conversation with you which means you will have blown a possible chance at securing a great job for yourself.
  • There is nothing like someone who is on the ball and consistent with it and, in my experience, it is these very people who are the most successful in all that they do! Set yourself a routine that is much like the one you are likely to have once employed and stick with it. Wake up early, have breakfast, bathe, get dressed then go to work in your role as a full-time job seeker. Be consistent, efficient, diligent and proactive. Remain focused, patient, productive and hopeful. Speak with family and friends about jobs at their place of employment, check local newspapers etc, visit nearby businesses and keep a record of everything. Should a prospective employer contact you, you want to be able to respond to any questions put to you with confidence and with as few nerves as possible so, having notes to hand will help you to do that. Be organised!!! 


While it is a very tough life we each seem to be living now, it isn’t necessarily one that is completely bad and, by choice, you can make good things happen for yourself. Social media sites are also a great way of reaching out, connecting with others and seeking opportunities. Hash tag ‘jobs’, ‘work’, ‘employment’ and the alike. See what you find!

Most importantly, do not shun certain job offers. It is better to be in work than out of work, plus it’s easier to move from job to job than it is from unemployed to job, trust me!! ;) Worry not what others may think of you as one who is unemployed and instead turn your attention to what you think of yourself. If you do not like the way things with you are at the moment, do all that you can with what you have, starting from this very moment, to see a positive change.

Don’t moan about it, set about changing it!! Anything is possible with self-belief, determination and an incredibly thick skin! 

If you try any of the methods above do please inform me of the outcome and also, feel free to share any successful methods of your own. 


PS: For more about any of the above, or to discover how to do certain things, use GOOGLE!! ;)

Happy job seeking, folks!


 NEW YOUTUBE SHOW which you could be part of! The Real Talk TV Series UK
  
ALL IMAGES TAKEN FROM GOOGLE.


Tuesday, 10 June 2014

THE SINGLE PERSON’S ‘Good Relationship Guide’

How or why is it that so many singletons feel they can best advise those in a relationship? Is it because:
a) They are experts through experience who have yet to meet The One?
b) Their failed relationships have them reluctant to try again but, they want others to find love?
c) The standards they have make it challenging for them to find a match but great at advising others?

Here’s the thing: It’s probably all of the above and so much more! We each know what we want, like, enjoy and equally what we do not want, dislike and absolutely loathe. However, when we are the outsider looking in it’s always far easier to asses a situation with an open mind and use logic in deciding how best to tackle it. When the issue is ours to resolve it can be far more difficult to remove the ill feelings associated and so decisions are often made through irrational thinking which mainly stems from anger or frustration.

To be successful does not have one definition. How can it when there are so many of us in the world each with our own ideas and understanding of what we feel or believe success to be; especially where love is concerned?

Being single is great until it isn’t. Don’t front and tell me different…. *rolls eyes* I would not believe anyone who told me that they have been happily single for years because, it is natural to gravitate towards one another. We instinctively find certain people attractive (in some form or other) and in choosing to make a connection with those individuals, organically, feelings will develop – be that in favour or not. But, what is the fundamental difference between the couples who are able to go the distance and those who ‘flop’ within 3 months or 3 years, or even 13? 

Personally, (no, I’m not an expert but) I think it all comes down to 5 key things which I myself try to employ:
1) Consistency – to become complacent is to become disconnected. Maintain the investment (I'm talking about the efforts made to get and secure your partner) that you contributed at the start / the early days to keep both yourself and your partner on your toes.
2) Communication – done effectively you are less likely to go wrong and will always know where you stand with one another plus, you’ll also not have to question trust!
3) COMPROMISE with Understanding – learning the ways of your partner; allowing space for them to be their true self around you and giving them room to grow is beneficial to you both. There's nothing worse than the person you have chosen to commit to, warts and all, trying to change you! The difference between wanting to help someone improve and seeking to rid them of what makes them who they are is mahoosive!! REAL TALK!
4) Acceptance (within reason) - the differences between the two of you should be celebrated, appreciated and respected. After all, apparently, opposites attract ;)

5) Loyalty – this goes beyond a physical commitment; it’s about mutual honesty and making the choice to abstain from doing all things which you know you yourself would regard as being disloyal if your partner were to do the same, such as speaking to or seeing ex partners, overly flirtatious behaviour with others, even dressing inappropriately to give off certain signals etc.

In the past I’ve listened to some friends complain that their partners don’t do what they’re supposed to do or, that they were fed up of being the one making the relationship work and on one too many occasions I would hear the classic, “If they don’t make the changes I have told them to I’m done”… I myself have been guilty of such. At what point do we learn from our mistakes and go forward applying the lessons learned? The years are not slowing down…

I guess, in conclusion, what works for one couple may not work for another and so, at the end of the day, it really is a case of: each to their own. So we feel, so we do and so we do is what will be. That said, if your love for someone is so deep that they sit on each one of your nerves (you know when someone presses every button – good and bad? – except where the bad outweighs the good, of course) perhaps you are indeed meant to be with them however, it might be you who needs to reflect, reassess and work on improving certain things about yourself!

Surely we all want a real, long term, genuine, passionate, respectful, trustworthy, fun, exciting, happy relationship and, I think, when you’re single you sometimes project that through giving couples the advise you hope to be able to practice yourself (when you feel you have finally met The One) having become a better person and that is perhaps why singletons give the "best" advice ;)

ALL IMAGES TAKEN FROM GOOGLE

Thursday, 22 May 2014

WHO TOLD YOU WE'RE IN A RACE?


UK BASED RESIDENTS ONLY!
*** REAL TALK UK GIVEAWAY ***

WIN A SURPRISE REAL TALK UK GIFT

Limited time only!!
*** BRAND PERFUME, DVD'S, SHOES, BOOKS and MORE ***

Read this post and then follow the instructions below to enter!

WINNERS will be picked at random from those who answer the question correctly.

While I completely understand the urgency some feel to get their work out there, I cannot comprehend why certain people do so with such a desperation which often leads to them putting their work out prematurely!


If you must be in competition with someone let that person be whoever you were yesterday; whichever stage you were at with your goals.


In showing your cards too early, as the saying goes, you can often find that those you think you’re in a race with get ahead of you because, in seeing your game plan; realising that your aim is to simply be the first, you give your so-called competitor the upper hand. They see what you have to offer and can then play a hand they didn’t even know they had; one that you effectively gave to them!

I’m not saying you should wait longer than necessary to get something out to the public. I am simply a great believer in taking your time, feeling rather than thinking  you are ready; having no shame in deciding to pull back a little and to always ensure that what you are presenting is authentic, original and of good (if not great) quality!!!
Don’t rush anything. It’s all about what you do and how you do it not when!

Images taken from Google :)


Q: How many hearts are on the card held by the girl in the second image?

TWEET the answer to me @CharleyRealTalk
The WINNER WILL BE ANNOUNCED on
The Real Talk Radio Show UK!!

Wednesday, 14 May 2014

TRYING “ah ting!”

As most of you will know by now, I have been working on a new project for YouTube. THE REAL TALK TV SERIES is one which aims to positively inspire, encourage, inform and motivate upcoming talent, semi-established artists/performers as well as serve as an opportunity for such creative persons, businesses and the alike to raise their profile. Hopefully a number of ‘big-wigs’ in the entertainment/media field will take an interest in the talent featured ;)


Where did the idea for the show come from?
For many years I have been doing various work which sees me provide opportunities for others – Journalism, Youth Work, Blogging, Radio, Motivational Speaking etc and after being asked to present for several on-screen projects, of which the aims were to inspire others, I felt that there is a need for that to be a regular thing but one which isn’t filtered; where there is a real and honest look at all aspects of various industries, people, jobs etc including that of an aspiring TV Presenter who is learning on the job.

Why be the face of The Real Talk TV Series?
I spent just under 2 years auditioning aspiring TV Presenters (only females showed an interest) who would volunteer in the role and although they were each beautiful in their own way, fun and quirky, the second the camera was on them they turned into Newsreaders! Although not (yet) an amazing TV Presenter myself, I have a personality, a no-fear approach to such work and am not afraid of looking silly so, as was decided and agreed by the team, it made sense for me to present the show. For now… 


How is the show being funded?
There is no funding as such. We, the team, cover costs such as travel expenses, tapes for filming, refreshments for the screenings etc.

Will each episode focus on something specific?
Yes – this is the aim although we are still working on how best to do this as we know it is important to have the show be entertaining whilst being informative.

How did you get people to be on the show?
I contacted people I know, with whom I have a friendship or have worked with in the past. Also, having hosted live events, my own radio show and through journalism etc, I’ve met so many people who are extremely talented!! I reached out to them, pitched the idea of the show and (to date) each person I’ve approached has agreed to be involved.

What is the length of each episode?
Ideally, I would have liked each to be no longer than 4 minutes however; that is so unrealistic based on what we are trying to achieve so, 10 minutes is the aim.

When will the show launch and how often will there be a new episode?
Hopefully 24th May 2014 and weekly thereafter.

Why YouTube?
Why not? Currently it is the biggest platform on which to launch anything and everything!! Also, despite the many connections I have in the arts industry, I am without the power to simply have my work debuted on TV.

How did you get sponsorship from Happy Chap Clothing?
I met the founder (Raymond Mfon) a couple years ago after randomly coming across ‘Happy Chap Clothing’ on Facebook. I contacted him and asked if he would like his label to take part in a fashion show to be included in a Listening Party showcase event by NLPR Ltd. He agreed, we remained in contact and I later approached him about The Real Talk TV Series. He really liked the concept and so decided he’d love to be on board.

Where did the idea for the animation come from?
Like almost everyone in the world, or so it seems, I’ve always wanted an animated version of myself however not the standard (sims or cartoon) type that others have. I wanted something pixilated; quite 80s or 90s looking. I had the exact idea of its look and of the opening sequence to the show in my head but, I didn't know how to articulate that using the correct jargon or who to approach. In my frustration I shared my thoughts with Natalie (Production Assistant) and Emma (Videographer/Photographer/Editor) and they mentioned Chieze from Shining Concept whom they later introduced me to. I spoke with him and, like Raymond; he loved the whole concept of the show and agreed to come on board. 

Obviously, nothing starts out being 100% spot on but, what is hoped for The Real Talk TV Series long term?
That it is recognised and supported by a TV Network with an interest in showing it on their channel. Evidently the first series is very rough around the edges! With series 2 we are implementing all that we learned from filming the first time round. We hope by series 3 (if not 2) to have the show be super on point and for it to have a committed audience. Obviously the hits will be the deciding factor as to its future. That said I’ll always be happy that I chose to launch the project and will remain proud of myself and the team for our incredibly hard work!! 


2 screenings will be held prior to its launch. Since when do people hold a pre-launch screening for a YouTube show?
We may indeed be the first (ha-ha) however, it was of huge importance to me to have constructive feedback from professional industry persons, as well as those I trust, to be completely honest about how we can better the project. I don’t believe we will get such criticism from the general public. These days it seems more and more people are all about slating just for the sake of it rather than supporting genuine movements.

How are people able to put themselves forward to be involved?
Whether their interest is to feature or to join the team, they need only send their full name, BIO (or details of their past and current work) with reasons as to why they want to be a part of the show, together with a clear photo to realtalkuk_creative@outlook.com addressed to RTTVS.

The Real Talk TV Series does not aim to be a carbon copy of anything already out there or something polished. Its purpose is to give to others an online hub of all things positive, productive and beneficial in the hope that it will somehow be a source of inspiration, help and encouragement! There will never be a goal too big to reach. Let your self belief be your motivation!! x




TEAM
Charley Jai - @CharleyRealTalk / INSTA: charleyrealtalk
Chieze Ihecherenoma – INSTA: shiningconcept /
Natalie L Royer - @natalieleonna /
Emma Obichukwu - @EmmaObichukwu
Raymond Mfon - @HappyChapClo

YouTube
The Real Talk TV Series UK – to launch May 2014

Pictures taken by Emma Obichukwu and Edited by Charley Jai
Logo's supplied by each company, Edited by Charley Jai

Wednesday, 7 May 2014

SELF APPRECIATION

So, here's the thing: It seems to be that in America and some other countries, people are quite good at praising their efforts and achievements while in the U.K most often 'shy' away from simply loving themselves and accepting compliments from each other. Why?

I have no problem whatsoever in demonstrating gratitude towards others and myself. I'm aware of my strengths and weaknesses. I'm also fully aware that I am HUMAN and while I will continue to make mistakes until I draw my last breath, I appreciate the lessons to be learned from such mistakes.


We all need to know that within us there is an untouchable beauty, real talk! None of us were born with a bad personality so, even when we do wrong, it will always be as a result of having experienced some sort of hardship or devastation. Now while that probably won't justify our ill actions at the time it is an explanation and one we should therefore embrace as it will help us not to be so hard on ourselves but to commend our willingness (if that is the case at the said time) to change and improve who we are.

I'm not the best looking woman out there but, I am attractive and I have have great qualities, skills, abilities and talents. So too is your truth. Male or female, dodgy past or not, right here and right now YOU CAN CHOOSE the direction you take, the person you want to be and the beauty within you that you want to be seen.
Stay humble, stay true, stay as you wish yourself to be seen by others. False labels never stick! So, the next time someone compliments your looks, your outfit, your work, your success, your efforts or anything else just say, "thank you, I know and am grateful to you for your compliment".

Have a beautiful life, folks. So you decide, so it will be.

Images taken from Google
xxx